Well, I hope Joel McHale is happy.
Ok, so he's not the only one to blame, but is was the likes of McHale's portrayal on The Soup of Jon Gosselin as a hapless henpecked husband that must have drove the poor man to try and escape the world of a father-of-8-under-a-microscope.
Last night's premiere of the 5th season of Jon & Kate Plus 8 was bittersweet considering the recent developments. I believe Jon's side of the story, and I still understand that even the most innocent version of his galavanting is enough for Kate to feel very hurt and angry.
That's all you can really say. Exactly what drove Jon to such poor behavior, exactly what the couple's relationship is -- it's all pure speculation. Only the two of them truly know. What's up to us is to let these two figure it out -- especially for the sake of the children. But unfortunately, the media does not seem content to let them.
Gossip rags run covers like this, with sensational stories from folks who are paid big bucks for their indelicate info (I don't care if one of them is purportedly her brother -- what kind of brother would reveal such intimate details?):
And just look at the review of the show's premiere from the Washington Post. The producers of J&K did not send out a sneak peak, so the writer decided this was an appropriate time to launch a personal attack on the Gosselins, and a general attack on large families.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/05/24/AR2009052402680.html?sub=AR
The show is deemed "appalling." Kate is then unkindly described as a "succubus" (that's a devil-woman for those of you without a dictionary handy) with a "bizarrely unattractive" hairstyle who may "claw you to death." Her love and pride of her children is inexplicably condemned as a "horrifying validation of her brood's importance."
Jon is described as "a shell of a man" and the couple's sex life is questioned. The admittedly materialistic turn seen on the show is somehow approximated to mild "abuse." I found this all an unnecessary, highly personal judgment coming from a tv critic. He should know (better than most) that such shows -- and the media coverage of them -- are focused on the sensational. By no means are they fair or accurate representations of the real lives involved.
But the hate is not reserved for the stars of this show. The Duggars of 18 Kids and Counting are "pious," "epically backward," and "eerily sweet." Programs of this kind are "freak shows" and the moms' wombs are "clown cars." Couples who struggle with infertility are compared to wild animals. Large families are referred to as "litters" and those who watch the shows are psychoanalyzed as searching for the "soothing effects of belonging to the pack."
Even blogging moms are ridiculed that they "cannot shut up about every banal detail of their household." Harumph. No offense!
The critic then makes the PC leap to the consumption of resources, suggesting large families are not "green." He forgets that these households are run more efficiently than average, and therefore consume fewer units of resources per person overall.
But this critic is not alone in his diatribe. It baffles me why so many choose the shrill attack mode, usually found only in unedited chat rooms. Why not a charitable tone for this particular family that is struggling with the trials of success and fame? And why drag other families, famous or not, into the fray?
I can only surmise that there is a sector that feels defensive about limiting their number of children. They feel that they must denigrate large families and assail the obvious drawbacks. There must be something wrong with those people and their colossal clans! Who knows why they vilify those who made a different decision.
So Kate is an easy target. She runs her household like a drill sergeant. So? She got way more than she bargained for when she signed up for this -- never did she anticipate being hounded by photographers. She is not only dealing with the obvious pressures -- what most people don't understand is the responsibility of being an ambassador for large families.
I do.
I know what Kate is thinking: We want the world to see that -- while we don't have unrealistic goals of perfection -- we want to show our best side. Otherwise, we give fodder to those who would cut us down. We want everyone to see that, whereas our lives have more than their share of challenges, it is a great life, nonetheless.
Again, the show is but a glimpse of the most sensational moments of Kate's life, for less than 30 minutes a week. We're not there for the mundane, quiet hours upon hours. I say, the next time all those folks are the mother of 6 babies at once, then they can voice their opinions. Until you've walked a mile...
So enough sniping whether or not Kate is too demanding, enough speculation about Jon's actions -- let's all just root for a family in crisis to come out of this happy and healthy.
Oh, and don't buy those magazines!
I deleted a couple of comments that addressed something I wrote on another forum -- not because I don't stand by what I wrote, but because they were pulled out of an on-going discussion on that forum -- too much to include and address here due to time constraints on my part
But to the commenter -- Kris -- I'm not sure what you meant by your comments -- but if you sincerely want an answer, feel free to send me a message thru that forum (it would seem that a private message would work best, I think?)
Posted by: Colette Moran | May 27, 2009 at 09:58 PM